"If love involves remembering Who You Really Are, then does fear involve forgetting Who You Really Are?" Zac asked.
"Yep," I replied. "Let's say you're a wealthy and abundant person. Maybe you were born into wealth, so wealth feels natural to you. It's your homeostatic state. Money is like air — it's always there, and you never worry about it.
But then an economic recession hits, or something happens in your marriage or business, and you suddenly begin to worry about money. You begin expressing a fearful, contractive belief that you'll lose everything. You begin to hoard money as if you were holding your breath, unsure if there will be enough air when you breathe in again. This gap between Who The World Tells You You Are (an abundant star) and Who You Believe You Are (a small, limited circle) creates surprise in the system, which needs to be minimized. Then something 'bad' happens (you label it 'bad' because you fear it), and suddenly you become increasingly fearful. The system restores homeostasis by rearranging reality to give you a physical experience of being poor."
"God talks about the attractive power of fear very succinctly," I said.
The First Law is that you can be, do, and have whatever you can imagine. The Second Law is that you attract what you fear. [...]
What you most fear is what will most plague you. Fear will draw it to you like a magnet. All your holy scriptures — of every religious persuasion and tradition which you have created — contain the clear admonition: fear not. Do you think this is by accident?
Neale Donald Walsch
"And he's right," I continued. "If you push against something you don't want, you just create more of it."
"Why is that?" Zac asked. "I get that the system is minimizing surprise. But if I actively fight against something instead of passively fearing it, why will I get more of it?"
"Because you are literally creating it with your attention," I said. "Pretend that you're an actor on an empty stage. Now begin pushing against an imaginary brick wall, as if you were a mime. According to this algorithm, a brick wall will materialize on the stage. Your consciousness believes 'I am currently pushing against a brick wall,' and so reality says, 'Okay, you are.' If you believe you are fighting against something, reality will manifest something for you to fight against, thus allowing you to physically experience a purely conceptual idea about yourself. The harder you push, the more you reinforce a belief that there is something to push against. The more you reinforce that belief, the more you create what you don't want. It's very simple."
"So, are you saying I should just be passive?" Zac asked. "Like, I shouldn't fight against bad stuff?"
"I'm not saying you should do anything," I shrugged. "I'm just trying to explain the rules of the game. You can choose to do whatever you want with that information. It's your life."
"Yeah, but you're saying it's counter-productive to fight against things I don't like?"
"Yes," I replied. "When you push against something you fear or dislike, you create more of it because you are expressing a belief that there is something to push against. If you don't like something, just withdraw your attention from it and focus on its positive polarity.
If I went to a buffet with an infinite selection of food to choose from, I'd focus on the foods I wanted to experience. I'd tell other people how amazing my food choices were, and inspire them to pick delicious food as well. But I wouldn't point to the food I disliked and demand that someone remove it from the buffet. I wouldn't push against choices that others might make — I'd just make my own choices. Pushing against the other foods at the buffet will create more of those foods.
So don't stand against something — stand for something. Don't be anti-cancer — be pro-health and wellbeing. Don't be anti-racism — be pro-unity, empathy, and inclusion. Don't have a war against obesity, or drugs or poverty or sexism — instead, fight for their positive polarity. Our culture loves to vilify symptoms and fight against them, which is a very superficial and ineffective way of solving problems. Cancer is a symptom of an imbalance in the body. Racism is a symptom of generational prejudice and fear-based societal programming. Take any 'bad' thing, and you'll realize it's a symptom of a deeper underlying sickness in a self-organizing system. Until you address the underlying problem, the same symptoms will manifest in different forms, over and over and over again. That's the way this algorithm works.
So, as another example, don't focus on the income inequality between billionaires and homeless people unless you want to create more of it. Instead, focus on raising the standard of living and income of our most vulnerable and impoverished, without pushing against and vilifying the rich. When you vilify the rich just for being rich, you are expressing a belief that you're poor — so that's what you get more of.
Again, none of this is anecdotal or personal opinion or 'spiritual woo' — it's just cold, hard math. So stop pushing against your problems. What you resist, persists."
"Yeah, I get it," Zac said. "So here's my next question: if love is expansive and fear is contractive, why don't you just face your fears? You know all those deep fears you talked about aren't rational, right? There is nothing I don't like about you. That's why you're so hard to roast, and if I find one of your insecurities, I will really dig in — sometimes too hard. Your absent-mindedness drives me nuts, but you're still an eerily good and pure and lovely human. I've said that many times before. You're one of the best people I know."
"Thanks, Zac," I smiled. "I just have an intense fear of being seen. Like, really being seen."
"So why don't you face it? Put yourself out there. Say what you think. Show the world the real Nikki Durkin."
"What do you think I'm doing right now?" I giggled.
"Talking to me, alone, on a pier."
"No," I replied. "This conversation is playing into a grand mathematical master plan that is way bigger than just you or me. Right now, we're resisting the future expected entropy of the entire universe."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You'll see," I smiled.
